Does your video game currently have 100,000 miles on it or more? Are you experiencing engine troub–

Oh wait, sorry. Wrong script.

Ladies and gentlemen, step right up to Game Changer Studios, your new favorite video game developer! We know games front to back, top to bottom, soup to nuts. To us, there’s nothing finer than that new game smell. We love games so much that when we’re not making the damn things, we’re playing ‘em, thinking about ‘em–hell, we’re breathing ‘em in!

We know what it feels like to get hooked on a new game, the euphoria that comes from it. But we also know what it’s like to be disappointed and frustrated when a game or developer doesn’t quite hit the mark. 

Which is why we’ve put electric dog collars on all of our employees! Now we can absolutely one hundred and ten percent ensure or my name isn’t [insert name here] that our games will be of the utmost quality. 

Sorry, I keep messing this up. Hold on one moment.

What I meant to say is that Game Changer Studio is a video game company that makes…well, we make games. We are very excited to have you over for dinner. Please stay. We’re incredibly lonely. Thank you. Good night.